30 weeks Pregnant! What gifts can we give this child?

Surrounded by My Easter Flowers 

 

Dear Baby,

Whatever your name will be (Randall David or Isabella Michelle,) you cannot see us, and we cannot see you- but you can feel the warmth of my body and the rhythm of my movements. And you can hear.

You hear our voices, and you hear our songs. Every Sunday you hear us sing with our church family, and every day you hear me practice hymns on our out-of-tune piano. Even when we worship at home, we still worship- we sing to the best of our ability, we play, we praise.

I am no great musician, but music (even unskilled) is still a gift, a legacy that we, and our church family, give to you. It is a gift that in your fetal 9 months, and in the 5 years you will have at home with me, you will hear far more praise songs than yelling, far more praise songs than cursing, screaming, fighting, or even (hopefully) scolding.

Week after week, we will bring you to church- to be blessed, loved, prayed for, taught, and sung over. We will give you the only lasting gifts we can- a loving church family, and the opportunity to have a relationship with Jesus Christ. My parents gave me this, and it is a gift that their parents before them gave to them as well.

You will have to make your own choices, and the uncertainty of this pains me. Will you find the church a loving place, as I did? Will you love it in return? Will you choose Christ? Will you get lost in the woods of doubt and unbelief and hurt feelings along the way? These are your choices, and your life will not be mine to live.  

I may not be able to make your choices for you, but I can be faithful- faithful to my Lord, His word, His church. I can be faithful to pray for you, and to worship, not just weekly, but daily. I can only be faithful because Jesus has been so faithful to me.

Jesus has been faithful to me through so many things: through the hypocrisy, heresy, and harm caused by fallen leaders; through pandemics, politics, fear, and isolation; through childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, marriage, work, pregnancy, childbirth, children.

Someday He will still be faithful when I am old and weak.

And whatever your life brings- if you will follow Him, He will be faithful to you, too. Even as you struggle someday with the weaknesses of your father and me, and our eventual deaths- Jesus will be there, and we will know that even when we leave this world, we will not leave you alone or orphaned. He will be there.  

I do not know what manner of child you will be. I feel as if you are a boy, though I’ve been wrong before. I feel a great deal of energy from you- I feel that you are healthy and strong, and that you already love life. But that is all I know about you. 

Jesus knows much, much more than I do about you. He made you- He knit you together. He knows your eye color and skin color, but more importantly, He knows your spirit, your personality, your soul.

We are so grateful He sent you to us.

We can’t wait to see you face to face in a few months.

Love,

Your Mother,

Sandy (March 2021 (37 years old, 30 weeks/7months pregnant))